At this Age

I have seen and been through enough to write a series as long as the Harry Potter series, maybe even longer. Each book will be about different phases that I am going through in my life. I feel almost as if I were in limbo. Stuck in between wanting to be prideful and wanting to break down and just cry. How tempting is it to want to float back into the past when you have mentally prepared yourself for the future. You see yourself living comfortably, happy, and complete, but then you wonder just how you are supposed to get to that part. What road do I take? and how do I know if my destiny is set and stone